Manheim Township Rules!

  • Home
  • List
  • MT Sucks the Blog
  • More
    • Home
    • List
    • MT Sucks the Blog
  • Home
  • List
  • MT Sucks the Blog

Welcome

There's not much to see here.yet. Still planning the campaign against the Township. This website is not affiliated with Manheim Township in anyway. A good bit of the content will be in the form of political parody and mockery. Unless otherwise indicated, the phrasing and comments are not that of the Township Staff, Elected Officials, Contractors or Representatives of Manheim Township. 


I'll soon be requesting stories and issues regarding your interactions with Manheim Township. So, take your time, look around, and learn all there is to know about Manheim Township Sucks. We hope you enjoy our site and take a moment to drop the real Manheim Township Staff a line.


Names, addresses, email addresses and phone numbers will be posted when I get them.

Find out more

Manheim Township Rules!

Pay Your Taxes

1

Yeah, we know they're crazy high, but we have a lot of rules to enforce.

Maintain Your Property

2

From the street to 25 feet inside your property line; You Cut, Trim, Rake, and Clean it, but guess what? We control it! 

Get a Variance

3

Now that you know we control your property, pay us $700 and beg us to let you change things... If you're lucky, all the board members might show up! If not, a 50-50 split decision goes to the house. YOU LOSE!!! No! we don't need to justify ourselves. If there's a problem, our lawyer will talk to you away from the cameras, recording devices and witnesses. We don't want a public record of anything we say to be used against us. 

You can appeal, but you'll probably lose ... Again.

4

Lay down your money and try again! Three Card Monty is easier to win.


Dirty Little Secrets

There may be few

We may have a staff member text us what you say when we leave the room.

1

As an applicant, you can neither confirm nor deny that you you've been spied on...

We ask stupid questions to see the "Are you F'n Stupid?" look on your face

2

Let's face it, you know the question is stupid and irrelevant, but you've got to kiss the ring and stroke our egos if you want to have the slimmest chance of receiving our divine approval. God Save the Setback!!!

What the world calls something and what we call something will differ!

3

If it's White, we might call it brown, if it's semi-private, we'll call it solid. 

Stupid? Yes, but here's the ring again... Smooches.

Bottom Line: We don't really care what you want... If we like you, you might get approved. If you offend us or don't pay proper homage, don't plan on your plans.

Copyright © 2025 Manheim Township Sucks- All Rights Reserved.

  • MT Sucks the Blog

This website uses cookies.

We use cookies to analyze website traffic and optimize your website experience. By accepting our use of cookies, your data will be aggregated with all other user data.

Accept